Saturday, June 30, 2012

Concentrate Yo!

A time comes in your life when you finally get it.

Yes, I finally get it. The thing that is supposed to be the most important thing to me right now, is to focus on my exams. I screwed up my mid year exams really badly. Probably going to fail all of them. :( I have no idea how to face my teachers. Also, now I will have to work harder for prelims. Sigh, going library with Chin, Xiao Tian and Quan. Toodles :) Ps. Quan is a friend I just met yesterday xD

Thursday, June 28, 2012

My lips are sealed

I am dying to say what's in my mind but I know that I can't :X sigh...

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Sometimes help comes from unexpected people and places

So...recently I needed this chemistry planning experiment. I had missed a lesson 'cause of drama last time! ;( So...I asked a few classmates and everything but to no avail. The other missed it too, like in the case of Steph, and others had either misplaced it/lost it, or couldn't be bothered to look for it. Or they missed that lesson too. But this thing is really important 'cause it will come out for CT and could take up 8 - 10 marks! So time to reveal the saviour: Jiamin, my guitar friend <3 Thanks babe! :)
Next time you need anything can come find me kay? And I know that An and Fuxuan need it too cause they missed the lesson due to drama as well, so I shared it with them on fb :) Oh wells, Lit and Math was horrible today. I just pray for a pass and I promise I will learn AP-GP damn soon! :( It cost me 25 marks during the test. Oh...and An and I had a coincidental sitting arrangement for the math paper. We were right beside each other. Nice coincidence! :) Gotta go study chem now. 2 more papers to go!

Sunday, June 24, 2012

The Awakening

"The Awakening"

A time comes in your life when you finally get it.

When, in the midst of all your fears and insanity, you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out...ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying and blaming and struggling to hold on.

Then, like a child quieting down after a tantrum, you blink back your tears and begin to look at the world through new eyes.

This is your awakening.

You realize it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change, or for happiness, safety and security to magically appear over the next horizon.

You realize that in the real world there aren't always fairy tale endings, and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you... and in the process a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are... and that's okay. They are entitled to their own views and opinions.

You learn the importance of loving and championing yourself... and in the process a sense of new found confidence is born of self-approval.

You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they did to you - or didn't do for you - and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected.

You learn that people don't always say what they mean or mean what they say and that not everyone will always be there for you and that everything isn't always about you.

So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself... and in the process a sense of safety and security is born of self-reliance.

You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties... and in the process a sense of peace and contentment is born of forgiveness.

You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view.

You begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really stand for.

You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you've outgrown, or should never have bought into to begin with.

You learn that there is power and glory in creating and contributing and you stop maneuvering through life merely as a "consumer" looking for your next fix.

You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a bygone era, but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build a life.

You learn that you don't know everything, it's not your job to save the world and that you can't teach a pig to sing.

You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that martyrs get burned at the stake.

Then you learn about love.

You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you would have them be.

You learn that alone does not mean lonely.

You stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes.

You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO.

You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing things over and ignoring your needs.

You learn that your body really is your temple. You begin to care for it and treat it with respect. You begin to eat a balanced diet, drink more water, and take more time to exercise.

You learn that being tired fuels doubt, fear, and uncertainty and so you take more time to rest. And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul. So you take more time to laugh and to play.

You learn that, for the most part, you get in life what you believe you deserve.

You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for and that wishing for something to happen is different than working toward making it happen.

More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success you need direction, discipline and perseverance. You also learn that no one can do it all alone, and that it's okay to risk asking for help.

You learn the only thing you must truly fear is fear itself. You learn to step right into and through your fears because you know that whatever happens you can handle it and to give in to fear is to give away the right to live life on your own terms.

You learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom.

You learn that life isn't always fair, you don't always get what you think you deserve and that sometimes bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people... and you learn not to always take it personally.

You learn that nobody's punishing you and everything isn't always somebody's fault. It's just life happening. You learn to admit when you are wrong and to build bridges instead of walls.

You learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be understood and redirected or they will suffocate the life out of you and poison the universe that surrounds you.

You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted, things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about: a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot shower.

Then, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself and you make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never, ever settle for less than your heart's desire.

You make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful possibility.

You hang a wind chime outside your window so you can listen to the wind.

Finally, with courage in your heart, you take a stand, you take a deep breath, and you begin to design the life you want to live as best you can.

~ Sonny Carroll

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Whoever this Sonny Carroll person is, thanks for that. :) There are lots of learning points from that and I am going to do a reflection on these when I have time to blog after the Common Tests! :) Toodles~

Saturday, June 23, 2012

Exam stress!

I got pimples already from
Exam stress TT btw I am using my iPhone to blog now. Pretty convenient eh? :) don't have to turn my comp on! Gonna get darker eye bags soon too! ><. "I'm going out of my mind...all day and all night" - One Thing by One Direction. I have 12 chapters left to study and roughly 6 days to do it TT so...2 chapters per day. I am screwed >< Hope luck is on my side this time. Why have I been slacking/procrastinating?? Shall go and shower now then back to the books =[ hell, even Brielle the smarty is stressed out!

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Things to do with friends...

Things to do with friends after common test:

1) Go Harry Potter Exhibition with Drama HP fans :)
2) Go karaoke with drama people
3) Watch Hunger Games with Fuxuan and others who havent watched it on my comp!

Things to do with friends after Promos:

1) GO LASER TAG BABAY! :D
2) CHALET!
3) Watch my first M18 movie with fellow 18 year olds :D
4) Celebrate the world not ending xD
5) Maybe drink a little vodka legally ^^ just a little! :P

Things to do with friends at the beginning of 2013:

1) Get driving lesson with Judy and other 18 year old friends

Things to do with friends after A Levels:

1) One more chalet!
2) Go overseas!!
3) get a job together :)

Went to Library to study ^^

Went to library with Fuxuna and Ru to study today :) It was quite successful I must say :) Then I came home at around 7pm and brought them home with me and we decided to relax a bit by watching music videos and for me, singing along ^^ Then I watched my very first episode of Running Man with them! Quite funny and ridiculous I must say. :D Wan Ling if you're reading this I'm sorry couldnt't hang out with you today :(

Oh wells, must go and study now. Lots of stuff to get into my head :(

Fuxuan rebonded her hair btw! :) she looks so much cooler ^^

Monday, June 18, 2012

PW @ Steph's house

Met up with Hansel and Shamira at Jurong Point yesterday to take 241 from there to Steph's house. Chatted with Shamira and Hansel on the way. Told Shamira about Justin's surprise birthday party and asked Shamira for more details about the class outing. Sounds damn fun :D Apparently one of the dares involved drinking coffee. And the master of drinking coffee (ME) was sitting at home trying to study chem :( Damn! Hansel told me about how fun his Church camp was and said I should've gone. :)

After we got off the bus, we got lost xD All the terrace houses looked the same and some of them even had the same number :O It was damn funny. We all stood under a tree for shade and waited for Steph to come to our rescue.

Then during PW, Shamira got the message that her sister was in labour. Omg! How exciting eh? And baby Emma came to this world yesterday ^^ We kept singing songs and fooling around during PW 'cause we became lethargic after a while. Steph's mom was nice enough to provide us with lunch :) Thanks Auntie! We left Steph's house at 4pm, she also left us with 'cause she was going for dinner with her sec school friends and teachers :)

Then last night I watched the movie Pearl Harbour on Channel 5. I'm not a great fan of war movies but Pearl Harbour was exceptionally nice :) They even managed to weave a love story into the plot. It was interesting, to see the sacrifices those soldiers made for their countries :( So many people died. :X But I'd rate the movie a whopping 4.5/5. :)

Alas, I must finish studying for my common tests before 27 June so I guess I'll sign off now. Toodles~

"Interesting" new FaceBook friends...

So recently, I have been getting some peculiar friend requests. From guys in India... o.O Like, how DO you know me? How DID you find me? Nevertheless, I accepted their requests 'cause usually I don't have the heart to reject. Now lemme talk about them.

Guy#1: Events Manager in India. Or so he says. I believe him though, cause recently he came to Singapore to organise something. And I saw pics of him at Marina Bay, Orchard Road etc. And he kept asking me to meet him. I guess if I was more grown up I might have gone ONLY OUT OF CURIOUSITY but I think I am too young to meet strangers from other countries just like that :X So I told him I can't.

Guy #2: Literally asked me to be his girlfriend -.- Never been a fan of long distance relationships. Yep, you guessed it. He's in India too. ~.~ Saw some of his pics at his office and he looks friendly enough too but no thanks. I am still crushing on Justin. Besides, this guy's 20+. A bit too old I think. But I have been playing along a bit to see where this goes and it really got out of hand the other night. He was asking me to stay up til 2am to chat with him on FB. o.O Dude, I need my beauty sleep. And he was saying slightly inappropriate things too...if you get what I mean. Gotta start ignoring him from now on.

Guy#3: 15 year old guy. Keeps saying he wants to be my best friend. Yep, he's from India too. He's a cute kid and I don't mind saying hi to him once in a while on FB but demanding to be my best friend is just too weird for me. Like, hello, I just met you. And this is crazy!

Guy#4: From AFRICA. The Indian ones, I still understand but where did THIS guy pop out from? This guy's my age. At least. And he said he's falling in love with me. Bitch Please, you don't just fall in love with random people you meet on FB. Although I am flattered by all the sudden attention I am getting from my interesting new FB friends, it's kinda creeping me out too. Then when I told this guy I'm already crushing on someone else, he told me to introduce one of my friends to him. NO way man. My friends have enough drama in their lives as it is, I'm not gonna add on xD I heard a FB alert. Lemme go check....
Lo and behold, it's this guy xD He says he has a physics exam tomorrow and needs my help. Dude, I have a physics common test after the June hols and I haven't even touch my physics. U still want my help?


Sunday, June 17, 2012

Study + Hang Out @ Mac

Met up with Ru and Wan Ling at the MacDonalds near Fuhua today to study but I guess we ended up catching up more than studying xD Took more pictures with them too :) Came home and watched Satyamev Jayate. And then watched Undercover Boss and now watching Unsourced :D Damn cool :D shall go and concentrate on the show! Bye!

Saturday, June 16, 2012

Xia Xue you changed my life!

So recently, I saw a post Wendy made on FB. It was a link to famous Singaporean blogger XiaXue's latest blog post! So...out of curiosity, I went to read it. She talked about "The Secret". And I do believe it changed my view of the world. Basically, she says we have to be grateful for the things we already have in life and not to be a sour puss. Sour puss' only get more shit. :D Explains a lot of things. I myself am a pessimistic person. So I guess I myself have been bringing negativity into my life all this while. :(  

And she also said that whatever you really want, the Universe will give it to you. Just use affirmations. For example by writing something 10 times down on paper. :) I know Ru and I have already done it. Hope it works. :) But like Brielle said, it isn't magic. So it may not work 100%. But I guess I can hope... :)


Officially have 10 days to finish studying for Mid Year Exams TT 

Bible Teacher coming over to my house later and then gonna meet Ru at Mac to study. Guess I gotta go, just wanted to blog about "The Secret" :) 


Friday, June 15, 2012

Justin's Surprise B'day Party @ Hard Rock Hotel

Met up with Fuxuan and Wendy at JE mrt at 3pm on 12 June and headed to ION. I was early as usual and had to wait for them. >< Met up with Zi Ning and Mei Ling at ION. Then I went to find my boss Adeline to get her to sign Wendy and my payslip while the others went to get Share Tea. <3 They got it for me too!
They went to Prologue to look for a book for Justin while I went to meet Adeline. When going back to Prologue I called Zi Ning to ask her to look for Imperius by Robert Harris but she said they chose the book alr. I must admit that I was quite sad that they didn't wait for me. D: Oh well. They wrapped it in bubble wrap and stuck a pink ribbon on it. :D We had a hard time trying to stop Zi Ning from popping the bubbles on the bubble wrap xD

Then we hopped onto the MRT and headed towards Harbourfront. Once there, we picked up the Sarpino's Pizza that Wendy had ordered for the party. Then we went to Cold Storage to buy the drinks and cutlery. We bought 10 bottles of drinks I think. So imagine the number of things we were carrying TT
And because we didn't have much time, we had to walk real fast and I was starting to regret wearing my new wedges. 
Then we went to Sentosa Monorail to wait for Douglas and Renee to come and pick us up as they had the access card to the Hard Rock Hotel room in which we would be surprising Justin. The Hotel is LAVISH. LUXURIOUS. GLAMOROUS. There were diamonds in the lift. :O Even if it is fake, it's BLING BLING. <3
Yep, it looks like that ^ Awesome or what? 
Justin, Syamim, Steph, Xue Yi and An were at USS the whole day. Other then the drama people, Justin's classmates also turned up to surprise him. :)
When Xue Yi texted us that they were about to come up to the hotel room, all of us hid under blankets and bedsheets and behind curtains. xD 
This is what a room in Hard Rock Hotel looks like. But of course with us teenagers there it was all messed up lah. I got this off the net!
When Justin entered the room, the lights were turned off. However, due to wrong timing on our part, our surprise failed xD but it's okay, he was pleasantly shocked anyway ^^
This is what I wore there. Got the top especially for the party from Jurong Point ^^ Mei Ling commented that it was nice ^^ And she is a fashionista so that meant a lot ^^
Fuxuan, Wendy, Zi Ning and I all chipped in for the book but I got Justin a present of my own too, a shirt that says "Are you talking to me?" from Fox! :D I hope he liked it, 'cause the book seemed to have disappointed him. :(
Rennes made him a photo collage and An gave him some musical instrument. Zi Ning gave him a card too! She drew Pokemon at the front! :) How cute! Think he liked it. I realised I didn't give him anything personal. :( I just hope he brings the shirt I gave him to UK! ^^ So that he'll remember me everytime he wears it!
I was the "DJ" during the party! I kept blasting music and coincidentally my phone has a lot of party songs ^^
We ate the pizza, and the birthday cake but apparently the drinks was for nothing. 'Cause there was booze. Vodka. 40% TT Dunno how but Steph managed to get it for us. It's the real deal man. Not the fruit vodkas they sell in Sheng Siong that is only 4.8% concentrated. :O 
Le Pizza ^
I didn't wanna try at first 'cause I was afraid I would get drunk but then Fuxuan got curious and wanted to take a sip. So being a monkey, I did what I saw her do and took a sip too. Here's how it felt: It burnt my tongue and my throat. Like hell. TT Why DO people drink this stuff eh?
And then, Fuxuan decided to take one whole shot and me, not wanting to be left out, drank a shot too. And the burning process repeated itself but the 2nd time was less painful xD It tasted like perfume TT If possible, I never want to drink again. Besides, I am still 17 so I am kinda guilty right now. TT
AND THEN, Douglas got drunk :X I thought he was fooling around but turns out he was really drunk. It was so bad that we had to call his parents to pick him up, since we couldn't send him home xD Apparently the security guard at Vivo kept staring at him! But the poor guy was just blabbering nonsense about literature. So cute~
Surprisingly, the others who drank were fine. At most slightly red-faced or sleepy. Fuxuan was the sleepy one xD I was perfectly sober :O 
Anyways, most of them left at 9.15pm but I didn't wanna go 'cause it may be the last time I would get to see Justin so I stayed till 10, even though I was supposed to be HOME by 10 xD The things I do for crushes TT
Justin gave most of the visitors goodbye hugs so I got one too. :) Made me so damn happy, even though I felt kinda awkward 'cause he knows I like him. Damn, there were so many things I wanted to tell him but I couldn't really get close to him 'cause everyone else was surrounding him :( 
And the most important thing I wanted to tell him was "Thanks for being a part of my life and I'm gonna miss you..." 
I hope I can go to UK one day and run straight into him. Sigh...
Well, I'll definitely remember that hug for years to come~
That's all for now. I gotta go do Chem. Fml.